Hey girl, let’s be free.
I love the new year. A time of reflection, newness, and clarity. It is as if every year we get a chance to reset and realign. Christmas is so busy, so colorful, and so fun! But as January rolls around things begin to slow down and I gain clarity once again Every year Mwita and I make a point to sit down and reflect on our past year, what we enjoyed, what we learned, and what we can do better. We set our goals for the year, the things we want to accomplish, the dreams we want to realize, and the goals we hope to achieve. I love that time to consider the person I want to be and to list the things I hope to do in the new year.
This year as I was reflecting on my main theme or goal for the year, I clearly had the idea of freedom rolling around in my head. Be free.
I think in this world of constant social media updates and the details of just about everyone’s lives right at our fingertips, it is so easy to compare and to focus on what other people are doing. Oh, on their Instagram they go out for coffee more than me, their hair looks nicer than mine, their kids look happier, they pin healthier food on Pinterest, and she uses more essential oils than I even knew existed. Are we tired of that? She must have a poverty mentality, well she spends too much on shoes, all she ever does is exercise, she never gets off the couch, I can’t believe she ate TWO cookies, all she ever eats is salad. Are these the things that define us and the standards we measure one another on? Then none of us win.
Whatever. Be free.
As I I think on this upcoming year, I long for freedom. That is why Mwita and I embarked on our crazy adventure anyway, to free ourselves of expectations, commitments, and the need to do what everyone else is doing. And even in all that, it didn’t come easily. Freedom is something that is deliberate and sought after. Believe it or not, it takes work to be free.
I encourage us all to do what brings freedom, what brings joy! Do what makes your heart come alive! There are too many good things, to many adventures to find, things to create, people to love than to spend our time comparing ourselves to one another! Let us find freedom in the connection, not comparison. I think women are the worst at this. It is so easy to look at someone else’s life, but what we post or say in public is only a fraction of what is really going on. We all have our own things. Even I was posting some gorgeous photos of African sunsets, all the while going through one of the toughest seasons in my life. But unless someone actually asked me, they never would have known.
I think as women we need to call each other to life! We all have insecurities and doubts, hard days and worries. We all wonder if we are the only one that doesn’t have it completely together. Who better to share those things with than with people are are dealing with the same things! I love nothing more than to see real and true friendship. I have a few of those kinds of friends and I cherish them. A friend that I could call after a horrible day at work, she would commiserate and then we would also talk about the awesome things, the life-bringing things and then talk about how we would change the world. We need those people in our lives- we all do. People to go with us to the depths and then help carry us back out again.
To be able to be open and vulnerable and real, to pursue the things you truly love and let the things you do merely out of obligation fall to the side. To be comfortable in your own skin and and to love those around you for doing the same. That sounds like freedom.
That’s what I love about the world- everyone is different. We all have our thing, our dream, our bit of creativity. That makes us beautiful, unique, and free. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Don’t focus on your flaws. Don’t measure yourself to the next person you see. Please, just be comfortable being you. There is no one else that can do it. My true longing in life is to see women, free and confident that are able to call forth life in one another. Comparison is done, judgement -gone. What is left for us is passion, kindness, and the ability to be free.
I came across a quote from the lovely Lupita Nyong’o that resonated within me.
“You can’t eat beauty, it doesn’t sustain you. What is fundamentally beautiful is compassion, for yourself and those around you. That kind of beauty enflames the heart and enchants the soul.”
Freedom. Beauty. Enchantment of the soul.